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Humans are meant to be in a community. Acquaintances share news or strangers become friends in a public space to have that comfort of company. Every individual should have access to a third place in their life. And while options are becoming few and far between, there are still a few to try out.
The third place refers to a space where people can mingle without obligations. The first place is the home, where you may have responsibilities, chores, and family dynamics. The second home can refer to school or the workplace, where you still need to strive academically or professionally to succeed.
A third place is a pressure-free environment where you can just find support from other people. Ray Oldenburg coined the concept in the 1980s to highlight the importance of informal and free social interaction.
Yes, a third place is needed. It’s imperative at almost every stage in life because you need a sense of connection and community. Too much stress and loneliness can cause one to implode, negatively affecting your mental health in the long run.
Having a public space to frequent is especially evident when you’re an adult transitioning into different stages. You start to miss the everyday friendships made in school or struggle to make new ones. Find a sense of familiarity and comfort in your surroundings. It may even lead you to some beloved companions in the near future.
Everyone can have their own variation of their third place. If you’re someone who is still looking for that space, here are a couple of suggestions:
Find a local club that engages in a hobby you love. It could be anything from golfing to yoga to dancing and more. These groups will typically have their own facility that you can visit for the meetings. Another similar option would be classes— cooking courses and knitting guilds can be relaxing and enjoyable.
From the smell of the coffee to people having their own conversations in the background, there’s just something so comforting about being at a cafe. Find a nice local shop you can frequent every week and pick a spot. You can invite your family and friends along, but there’s also a certain thrill in talking to someone new there.
The park is also a great public space to turn into your third place. You can bring a book and just sit on the bench or have a packed lunch for an impromptu picnic. It’s also possible to stretch your legs and walk around. A light jog is a great way to get your mind off of any stresses that you’re experiencing at home or work.
The church is a good third-place option for religious people. It’s a space where they can concentrate on fostering their faith and talking with other like-minded people to gain perspective. Whether it’s a baptism event or mass, engage in the activities.
Discover a gold mind of books by going to the local libraries. Some even provide audiobooks and e-books nowadays if you prefer more digital forms. You can even strike up a conversation with the bookworms in your vicinity.
Want to become a fitness enthusiast? Join a fitness center and talk with fellow gym goers. You can share routines or ask them to spot you for your reps. A professional trainer would also show you the ropes of navigating the space while building a fitness plan.
Going down the aisles of a local thrift store can be enjoyable. You can look at many novel pieces and find new pieces to decorate your home with. It’s also great to meet fellow shoppers and discover hidden gems together.
A third place can be more than one establishment. You can take your car and drive down a familiar trail, taking in the beauty of nature along the way. Roll down the windows when you want open air, or consider renting a bike.
The beach is also a calming space you can visit when you need a break from home or work. Take in the sights of the seas and skies before you. Just remember to wear plenty of sunscreen when you’re heading there for UV protection.
Finding a third place can be challenging. Some public urban spaces have an air of exclusivity that could make you feel like you shouldn’t be there. There also seem to be fewer public spaces in some cities, which dwindles your options.
There’s also the matter of arrangement. Some people exhaust way too much time and energy when managing their jobs and homes. Even with remote work, you can be too exhausted to discover what space works for you.
It’s important to overcome the challenges of finding a third place to establish a safe space to turn to. Here are some tips to keep in mind:
Having a third place gives you a perspective that life is more than stress and hard work. You deserve to enjoy the spaces around you and find people to connect with. Venture outside and be surprised by what you’ll find. You can even share this blog post with a friend as an invitation.
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