5 Ways to Create Emotional Safety in Relationships

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Author Name: Beth Rush
Date: Thursday July 23, 2020

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While the word “safety” in conjunction with relationships makes many adventurous souls run for the hills, emotional safety is anything but boring. Feeling emotionally safe in a relationship is all about tearing down the walls between you, going deep and finding a fulfilling connection.

Emotional safety is the ability to feel open, vulnerable and safe in a relationship, which helps to form genuine connections between partners. Since emotional safety fosters open communication and mutual care, it also requires trust and devotion from both partners.

If you’re looking to create a more nurturing relationship together, there are a few things you can keep in mind to foster that connection.

1. Listen to One Another

Often, people wait for their turn to talk rather than truly engaging and listening to what their partner has to say. Building trust and reliability in a relationship is about being open and caring, which involves holding space for each other’s needs, thoughts and ideas. 

Communication can never work just one way. It needs to involve listening, so you can understand your partner better to help them feel seen, and so you can feel even more comfortable with them.

2. Be Vulnerable

Showing vulnerability is an exercise of trust. When you share deep expressions with them, you’re allowing them the opportunity to show you care and consideration. Vulnerability is a ripple effect — it moves like an ebb and flow. Being vulnerable is necessary if you want to see growth in the relationship. This can look like sharing secrets, desires or fantasies with your partner. 

When you’re vulnerable, it encourages your partner to show that side of themselves to you, which can create a loving exchange of care, compassion and safety.

3. Learn How You Each Prefer to Receive Love

Communicating properly and fully is key in showing each other that you care. People often prefer to give and receive love differently. The five love languages details this idea thoroughly, explaining that certain people rank certain expressions of love higher in value than others, such as quality time or physical touch.

By taking the quiz together, or even figuring out on your own which acts make you feel the most comfortable, loved and secure, you can bring that knowledge into your relationship to create a space of mutual safety. When each partner is receiving love in a way that speaks to them, they’ll likely feel more comfortable and valued by their partner. 

4. Put Your Body Into It

Body language and nonverbal communication are important parts of energy exchange within relationships. Over 55% of communication is actually nonverbal. Practices like eye contact, warm facial expressions and open body language are great examples of healthy nonverbal cues that you’re ready to care and listen to your partner.

Body language often sets the tone for your conversation, and choosing to show loving, open gestures can point you towards more compassionate interactions.

5. Express Gratitude

Gratitude is a great way to create an emotionally safe environment, where both partners feel seen and secure in the relationship. Expressing gratitude for one another creates positivity and connection, which contributes to an environment of emotional safety. 

You can engage in a conscious gratitude practice like journaling or gratitude sharing in your daily routine, or you can start to be more mindful of expressing gratitude naturally and regularly to each other. 

Emotional safety is about so much more than security. It’s about finding a deeper connection with your partner so you can build a stronger, more secure relationship that satisfies you both on a deeper level. 

When you engage in conscious communication and care for one another, your relationship can grow and develop in so many ways. Which practice do you plan to adopt to create more emotional safety?

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